Surprise Visit!

November 29, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Well, we came into town for dinner tonight and I checked the news.

Damn, while I was gone, Donald Trump insulted women, Jews, Muslims, Christians, Mexicans, Syrians, blacks, liberals, the military, latinos, journalists, the Chinese, Japanese, “hundreds of people” seeing crap that makes crap true, and just for good measure, the disabled. He demanded that the disabled apologize to him.  You know, for them being overly sensitive to bullies making fun of them.  They need to get over that.

I think he wanted to offend you personally but he forgot your middle name and/or your address.

I hear that Carly Fiorina has a whole bunch of money.  That’s sweet because she needs to be sued for inciting crazy people.

Last I heard, she says that the liberals caused the terrorist act at the Denver abortion clinic and then added that obviously Black Lives Matter had something to do with it because they need to be peaceful.

She also claimed that “The vast majority of Americans agree what Planned Parenthood is doing is wrong.”  That pretty much explains why numbers slip through her fingers.  19% of American believe that abortion should be illegal under any circumstance.

So, here’s the deal: I’m going back off grid for 48 more hours.  Please fix this crap.


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18 Comments to “Surprise Visit!”

  1. Sorry, you can’t fix stoopid.

  2. JAKvirginia says:

    Now, see! I specifically warned you about doing that. I told you to leave the crazy alone, didn’t I? But nooooooo… you had to go and “check on things”. Well… see what you get?

    And what’s this? You want this crap fixed? Just like that, huh? Who do you think I am… God or something? Even sweet Jesus won’t touch that crowd! You can tell just by listening to those idjits.

    So… you go and have fun and relax like you were told. We here at TWMDBS will do what we can to tidy up before you get back. But I’m not promising anything. See you soon. Hugs.

  3. Just as soon as I can locate that magic fairy dust in the garage.

  4. slipstream says:

    Okey-dokey, we will have it all fixed by the time you get back. No problemo.

  5. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Thought the fixing was why Joni Ernst went to Dee Cee. Will send her a gift certificate for some dull tools and a list of those to summon to Dee Cee for their fixing. Maybe split the list between her and Mental Ben. When they finish the list, they can perform a professional courtesy for each other.

  6. The problem is global warming. See, global warming causes droughts. This mean fewer people have lawns – which means there are less places to put all the bovine-derived organic fertilizer spewing from the Republican fever swamps like a busted sewer line to use.

    So much manure, so few lawns…

  7. AlanInAustin says:

    I wonder who else has noticed that while Trump claims “thousands” in NJ celebrated 9-11 and he’s seen it all documented in tweets (, Twitter didn’t begin until 2006 — FIVE YEARS LATER.

  8. I’m reminded of Rosa Lewis, a cockney kitchen girl who became the chef and owner of London’s most broad-minded hotel, walking in to find the place in ruins after a bombing raid during the Blitz. “I want all of this cleared away by tomorrow,” she told the staff. It wasn’t, of course. (A dear friend of mine wrote her biography, which was the basis of “Duchess of Duke Street” on Masterpiece Theatre years ago.)

    Headline: “10 groups Trump offended since launching his campaign”

    Only ten? The disabled, reporters, Iowans, Muslims, Seventh-Day Adventists, African-Americans, Asians, POWs, women, and his competitors.

    Hey, you left out Hispanics, at least. Not to mention people who like truth and decency.

  9. I’m just waiting for Trump to attack puppies.

    And kittens. Especially kittens. Everybody know that kittens are leftist terrorists.

  10. Is “Hispanics” the preferred word? Latinos? I try to use the terms people want to be called by, but it’s hard to keep track. I grew up when Black was Beautiful, and nobody’s ever called me a European-American, so I get confused. And I don’t know what’s wrong with “handicapped,” because I think of it like a horse race– some horses are assigned heavier weights (because they were better runners in previous races) and have to work harder to win, but that doesn’t mean they can’t win. It sounds better to me than “disabled,” which sounds like you just can’t no matter how hard you try.

  11. LynnN, I think kittens are Amoral Chaotics and worshippers of Eris, Goddess of Discord. Terry Pratchett pointed out that their standard facial expression is insane amazement.

  12. Rhea: Dogs have owners. Cats have staff

  13. e platypus onion says:

    “Kittens Revenge on Trump” by Claude Balz

  14. Linda Phipps says:

    Re: the amoral chaotic kitten. It’s my mascot animal … I recently learned that having RHneg blood means I was “created” by extraterrestrials. It all falls together, and I am actually a proud cat-loving Atlantean.

  15. Like it or not, we are going to have to get used to acute republican chaos for at least another year and then they might simma down to just chronic chaos. With Trump as the leading hate monger, the rest of the pack are scrambling to keep up.
    Our democracy, is fast becoming an idiocracy.

  16. @Rhea” I worked with a program providing counseling, job training and various kinds of support for people with disabilities.(funds cut during sequestration–sort of like castration). The proper usage is “people with disabilities”. A testimony from one of the clients: “I was homeless, jobless, and toothless. Now I have a job, I have a home and I can smile.”

    It’s amazing what people with disabilities can do with a hand up.

  17. Marcia in CO says:

    Just one slight correction … The PP clinic is in CO Springs, not Denver.

    All of the Repukes trying to be President are a good reason for abortion … too bad their mothers didn’t know this at the time!!

  18. screecherguy says:

    Hey Carley, why the long face?