Screwed by a Shortreed

May 31, 2012 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

I don’t think it has dawned on anybody yet that the totally vicious lying crazy woman who let some low-life Republican writ twit buy her the Democratic nomination for a district judgeship in Harris County has not only screwed us, but has also tied the entire county and justice system to a barbwire fence for another screwing.

Elaine Palmer‘s seedy, low-life, disgraceful  campaign to beat the Honorable Democratic Judge Steve Kirkland worked and now we have an unqualified, complaint-ridden Democrat running against … oh dear God, help me …. a Republican named Ken Shortreed.

Ken almost has a website, and he seems like an awfully cheerful fella.  But, I see a few problems with his being a District Court Judge.  Just a few.

First off, there’s an odd video on his website.  I mean, I suspect it’s a long video but I didn’t have the courage to click the little GO button because the title of the video kinda scared me.

The top of a video at his website —

Dude, I know how you feel, for me every ballet is loooong.  Cripes, that swan woman flops around on the stage for an hour before she dies.  Just belly-up, Girl!  And there’s not even popcorn.

In the video he explains that he meant to say, “It’s a long ballot but at the bottom there’s a Shortreed.”

Well hell, now I respect him even less than I did when I thought he didn’t like ballet.

And he does have a Facebook page with this interesting sampling of people who inspire Ken.

Okay, first off, he couldn’t bother to get a picture of Jesus?  Those suckers are all over the place.

Now, if I were to pick the trinity of people who inspire me, Dean Gerald Treece of South Texas College of Law would not rank up there with Jesus.  I mean, Treece is a nice guy and all, but I doubt he’s had any luck changing water into wine.  I could be wrong.  I did not go to writ twit school. No telling what they do behind those closed doors.

So, come November we get to pick between a puppet woman and a crazy man.

Lord help us.  Oh wait, no.  Dean Gerald Treece help us.

Thanks to Bruce for the heads-up.

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8 Comments to “Screwed by a Shortreed”


  1. Never have done a “write in” on and eSlate…. November will be the first time ever.

    Since I can’t vote for either one of these candidates….. I’ll write in “Steven Kirkland”.

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  2. from the Shortreed website:

    Ken is experienced, fair and knowledgeable with the rules of evidence. He has represented clients in nearly 100 trials and over 115 mediations. His other accomplishments include:

    Almost two decades in private practice
    Believes the law should be applied with consistency and fairness
    Teaches Texas Business Law at Lone Start College
    Extensive courtroom experience

    I DID NOT KNOW THERE WAS A “LONE START COLLEGE” ANYWHERE AROUND HERE.

    “Screwed” is an understatement.

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  3. Hold it…20 years of practice and only 215 cases? So, 11 cases a year…1 per month…with December off…does that seem a bit slim in number to anyone else?

    Is it slim in number because he’s also teaching or slim in number because…his name isn’t the only thing that comes up short?

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  4. Not saying this is the case here, but there are some people who feel using a representation of Christ (i.e., picture) is sacrilegious. But at least he could have used a different icon than the generic one? Like a cross or a rose?

    I can’t get FB at work. Is the Jesus Christ a link to a FB page? In that case, he surely should have shopped for one of the FB pages that had a better profile “photo.”

    And may I say that the leprechauns campaigning for him are just a bit spooky?

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  5. Star, business law doesn’t often end up in court. Maybe he just writes scads of contracts. But you are right, 100 trials is not “extensive courtroom experience,” nor is mediation, which often keeps trial from becoming necessary.

    Lone Star [sic] College is a community college in northern Harris County from the look of it http://www.lonestar.edu/. The only “Business Law” class I can find on the website is under Continuing Education. Business Law I has only the prerequisite of higher level English. “Principles of law which form the legal framework for business activity including applicable statutes, contracts, personal and real property, wills and trusts, consumer law, and agency.”

    So maybe most of his “extensive courtroom experience” is probating wills? And this makes him qualified to be a judge because…

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  6. daChipster says:

    “Screwed by a Shortreed”

    Would it be more satisfying if it were a Longreed?

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  7. daChipster, you really made me laugh with that one!

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  8. DH worked at a business that had Shortreed as their lawyer. We wound up suing the seller of our newly purchased house because he removed items that were in the contract. New to Houston, Shortreed was the only lawyer we knew and this was not rocket science. It was just a lesson in how to treat people. We mediated and prevailed. The seller wound up donating the value of the stuff he lied about or took to my favorite charity. I was negotiating with the mediator. The only time Shortreed got excited was when I said that I did not care who got the tax credit for the donation. Anyway, throughout the entire process it was clear that Shortreed was not real bright. It was confirmed when he sent his bill to the business and not to me. It also caused me pause that he would even bill the business for what was clearly a personal expense. We paid his bill, but it took 2 months to get it straight.

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