Archive for the ‘Sumbitches’

As Bad as It Gets

June 22, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Sumbitches

 

“To find a man’s true character, play golf with him.”

–P.G. Wodehouse, English writer

This saying is more true than almost any other.  A guy who cheats at golf or is an ass on the golf course is and cheater and an ass at life.  I’ve seen it a dozen times.  Well, here’s another example of just what an ass Trump is.  He was recently videoed DRIVING A GOLF CART ON THE GREEN at his club in Bedminster.  If you are a non-golfer, the ONE THING you NEVER do is drive even close to the green, much less on it.  Doing so shows huge disrespect for the course, the game, and your fellow golfers, not to mention the poor greenskeepers who have to repair the damage. It’s a good way to get ejected from a golf course, but I guess not your own.

Here you go, you can watch with own eyes:

Props to News & Guts

This Will Hurt Your Neck

June 17, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Sumbitches, Trump

File under Sumbitches:

Yesterday, Newt Gingrich, career philanderer and prolific liar, made the head-snapping pronouncement that a US president “cannot obstruct justice“, and can fire anyone he wants to fire, regardless of legality.  His comments were made at the National Press Club where he was peddling his new collection of fairytales, Understanding Trump, which is his usual pile of manure delivered with the gravity of a college professor.  Apparently to Gingrich, there is a completely different set of rules for a Democrat in the WH than for a Republican.

Never burdened by the truth or a sense common decency, Gingrich is famous for delivering these kinds of proclamations that swing from one wild lie to another, changing his “sincere” belief to match whatever argument he’s positing at the time.  This proclamation, though, is especially egregious; when he was speaker of the house, he lead the impeachment of Bill Clinton for lying about having a sexual affair and obstruction of justice.   To make matters worse, at the time of the impeachment, he was having an affair himself with his current wife, Calista, while going after Clinton for his affair.  He was forced out of the Speaker job in 1999 under a storm cloud of ethics violations and election losses.

Gingrich is a shameless liar and his books are useful as two things: Kindling and toilet paper.

 

Outrage over Julius Caesar; but Wait…

June 12, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Sumbitches, Trump

It’s been all over the news this weekend.  Shakespeare in the Park is presenting a new version of Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar, with the Roman ruler looking almost identical to Trump, complete with idiotic combover and 3 foot long red tie.  As in the original script, his is violently dispatched in the middle of the play.  Cue the outrage in 3-2-1…it came spewing out of every pore of the right wing noise machine, and DJT Jr. even chimed in on The Twitter, asking if taxpayer money was used to fund the production.  The furor was so fervent that sponsors, Delta Airlines and Bank of America caved and pulled funding, afraid to offend Trumpists.

But, THAT, of course, is not the only modern version of Julius Caesar performed in

Guthrie Theater, Dowling Studios

recent years.  In 2012, director Rob Melrose produced a version with an Obama lookalike as the famed Caesar.  It was also performed in New York by the Acting Company.  And yes, that Caesar was also violently dispatched in mid play.
The difference between 2012 and 2017?  The noise machine is now going nuts when in the previous production we heard nothing but crickets.  “Thine hypocrisy will be thy downfall.”

Or something like that.

Culinary Scandal

June 11, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Russian Hacking, Sumbitches, Trump

File under “Long Ago in a Galaxy Far Away”…

If you’re like me, you’ve run out of words to describe the slow motion train wreck that is today’s White House.  Shocked.  Stunned. Astonished. Embarrassed.  Humiliated. Outraged. Aggrieved. None of those words sufficiently describe the relentless onslaught on our senses these last months as The. Worst. President. In. U.S. History. eviscerates virtually every tradition, custom, and law that governs our executive branch.  Common decency suffered a quick death at 12:01 on January 20th.  After that, this walking, talking violation of the Constitution has been urinating all over our society while stuffing his pockets full of foreign money.  Have I described this administration accurately?  I believe I have.

So.  Let’s go back to this same point in Barack Obama’s first term.  He was also dealing with a HUGE scandal himself.  The scandal?  He went out for a hamburger with his pal, VP Joe Biden and dared to order his burger with dijon mustard.  That’s right, folks, that sissy latte’ sipping secret Muslim from Kenya dared to order a traditional American dish with a French mustard.  Outrageous.  The noise machine lit up, lead by the knuckle dragger, Sean Hannity.  Have a look:

That same noise machine today (what’s left of it) is whistling past the grave yard, defending Trump and his mob buddies for cozying up to despots and hackers.  I wouldn’t be surprised in the slightest if characters from The Empire showed up as Trump surrogates on national television.

Another Criminal Elected to Congress

May 25, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Sumbitches

Greg Gianforte, who body slammed a reporter on earlier this week for asking a question he didn’t like, was just elected to represent the stupid state of Montana.  Another criminal takes a seat in the People’s House. Facts and common decency no longer count in this country.

I can’t think of anything funny to say.

What Happens When Texans Elect a Jackass

May 15, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Sumbitches

Ol’ Deepfryer Sid has done it again – a rancher was concerned that the label on a new feral hog poison said that eating the meat of a poisoned hog could cause illness or death.  Sid’s solution to that?  Just take that warning off of the label.   Yes, unfortunately you read that right.

What a jackass.