Because Jesus Gave You That Disease and You Should Be Thankful

November 02, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Jesus Huckster Mike Huckabee think Jesus is in the pre-existing condition business, and we just don’t appreciate that enough.

huckabee-220x220He explained his theory at the Value Voter’s Summit last month.  He postulated that you can’t call and get homeowners insurance after your house burns down so little babies born with a severe disability should not get health insurance either.  Too late, baby. If you wanted Mike’s help, you should have stayed a fetus.

And if you’re a 25 year old with a congenital heart problem and no longer eligible on your parent’ health insurance policy, it’s time to head on down to the casket store.  Mike does promise you a very nice Christian burial though.

One other thing.  Jesus specialized in pre-existing conditions.  Jesus did not heal the well. He healed the lame, the blind, and even the dead.

Mike sells something that will cure you of diabetes, scabies, hammer toe, tennis elbow, dandruff, cancer, sunburn, and the heartbreak of left handedness. That should be enough for you.

 

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0 Comments to “Because Jesus Gave You That Disease and You Should Be Thankful”


  1. TexasEllen says:

    May Jesus extend mercy to Huckabee in the same measure as Huckabee has extended mercy to “the least of these.”

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  2. People like Huckster is a reason that young people are turning away from religion.

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  3. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Is Mike admitting he wants to shoot his own kids? All of them seem to have a range of pre-existing conditions.

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  4. Of course, if you have cancer, Dr. Carson has connections with that company that can magically cure it.

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  5. @JJ
    Best quote ever.
    “Jesus specialized in pre-existing conditions. Jesus did not heal the well. He healed the lame, the blind, and even the dead.”

    Consider it stolen

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  6. What a disgusting, creepy little man.

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  7. Mike Huckabee used to have a somewhat jovial, avuncular personality in the last couple of presidential elections. Now he’s just another GOP asshat.

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  8. JAKvirginia says:

    I can’t use the word, because Momma, but it rhymes with duck. So _____ you, Mike Huckabee!

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  9. Lorraine in Spring says:

    Is it just me or has anyone else noticed that Mike Huckabee does a great Anti-Christ imitation?

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  10. Huckabee’s pre-existing condition is being mentally incapacitated if not brain dead so I hope he’s putting his money where his mouth is and doesn’t have any health insurance for himself.

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  11. l'angelomisterioso says:

    Hucksterbee proves yet again that the very best training ground for con artists of all stripes is a seminary school and most likely a baptist seminary

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  12. In this episode of “Rev Mike Huckabee, Faith Healer,” the good reverend chats with the afflicted who are lined up before him.
    “No can do.”
    “Preexisting condition.”
    “Burns from escaping your uninsured house fire? You should have stayed inside. Next.”

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  13. Don A in Pennsyltucky says:

    You can’t have an abortion if prenatal testing shows the presence of anencephaly; the Republicans need all the brainless future voters they can get.

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  14. JAK,virginia:
    My sentiments as well. Republicans have turned KKKristianity into a for-profit scam. There has to be a special place in hell for
    the Huckster.

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  15. This Baptist preacher needs to lay off the vodka shots!!!!

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  16. W. C. (Pete) Peterson says:

    “Heartbreak of lefthandedness”? What heartbreak? I’m left handed and I don’t have no stinkin’ heartbreak. In fact, my right hand is just there for symmerty, only good for shifting gears and holding coffee cups. It amazes me that some folks have been able to find other uses for their right hands.

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  17. UmptyDump says:

    Between Huckabee spouting this drivel and Pat Robertson claiming that kids who dressed up for Halloween as devils, witches, and goblins were celebrating Satan – I’ve had about enough of religious frauds for one week.

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  18. The Honorable Minster Huckabee does reminds of another Republican politician and showman P.T. Barnum. “There’s a sucker born every minute.” Barnum served as mayor of Bridgeport, CT. and as a member of the Connecticut House of Representatives.
    You could enter the midway of the Circus for the price of one thin dime and the first sideshow on the right you see the egress for only five cents.

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  19. May he come back in his next life as his son’s dog

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  20. Sam in San Antonio says:

    Does that mean he can’t get treatment for his severe personality disorder?

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  21. e platypus onion says:

    Heck no,Sam. The rules for you and me don’t apply to them.

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  22. @AKLynne

    Not sure ‘little’ applies to any of the Huckabee family; short maybe but not little, they are all moose sized. Maybe now they are Floridians manatee sized would apply. Lotsa rolls.

    @TexasTrailerParkTrash

    My other half was favorably inclined towards Huckabee in 2008 for a while based on his record as Governor and as you said a certain charm, then something happened something he said and that was it, off the list. We both voted for PBO

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  23. That Other Jean says:

    Mike Huckabee can take his “You should have been born well, sucker!” principle of medical coverage and stick it where the sun don’t shine (was that clean enough for Momma?)!

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  24. It looks like this is from 5 years ago, although I doubt his views have changed. I found a video of him on Fox making the same statements in 2013 as well. Just wanted to point that out.

    As the mom of an Autistic guy and widow of a guy who got fired from his job for getting injured on the job while having cancer (thus causing many income/insurance issues pre-ACA), Huckabee is an asinine, malicious louse.

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  25. I imagine Charlatan Huckster’s god would not forgive anyone who planted shoe leather in his anal orifice. It would be a sin worth committing anyway.

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  26. You were born to suffer, so dammit, suffer!!!

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  27. screecherguy says:

    Words cannot properly describe how much I loath this creepy piece of work. He’s not a Christian. He’s just a common ordinary conservative @@shole with a heavy mix of creeped out loathsome hypocrite on the side.

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