All Your Holiday Decorating Problems Solved
Okay, I admit it. Twitter is having a lot of fun.
Ivanka Trump’s lifestyle business has some Thanksgiving decorating suggestions.
Nothing says Thanksgiving like an enormous clam, dirt and sticks from the yard, and very pale squash things that look a little like toy pumpkins. Apparently, the white people are having white pumpkins for Thanksgiving dinner.
Here’s the link on how to build the damn thing. However, if I am invited to your house for Thanksgiving and that’s in the center of the table, I am taking my string beans and jello salad and I’m going home.
The folks at Twitter felt much the same.
There’s more at Huff Post.
Or, better yet, check out Twitter.
Thanks to Lynn for the heads up.
To me it says:
“If you implement Trump administration environmental policies, this is what you have you look forward to in a globally roasted post apocalyptic Thanksgiving. Bleached clams, stunted bleached pumpkins, and dead sticks.”
Horn of Plenty White.
1Is that one of them sex clams? The kind that old boy Roy Moore got his foot stuck in?
2Hint to Ivanka: Martha Stewart went to prison for less hideous decorating schemes.
3Forget the Twitter link. That just takes you to Ivanka’s propaganda and advertising. The Huffpo link is where I found the article to begin with, and that is where the entertainment starts.
4Is Louise Linton dominatrix? The edit of that image emphasizes her leather. Leather, leather, everywhere. Wow. Gives you a whole different view of Munchkin.
5So this is what people who think of themselves as our betters are doing with their Thanksgiving tables? Where are they planning to put the food? Is nouvelle cuisine still in, because that’s about all there will be room for among the “decorations”. Or maybe it tastes better off expensive Parisian tableware and designer placemats, even if the the decorator suggests mixing it in with Target and World Market napkins. Yeah, sure.
6A few observations, but most of all why are they eating on the kitchen counter?
7No, no, no–they’ll have the staff put the servings on the plates and then will be served.
Or, maybe a “Downton Abbey” style of serving, which looks like a choreographed dance.
It’s just us peasants that enjoy having a fabulous spread to let our families see the bounty of the year shown before us, and to enjoy having our families around the table.
But no politics!!!!
8No, no, and no! never put dried anything in the center of a table for any reason, especially if you decide to have lit candles in the arrangement. When the candles burn down they set the whole damn arrangement and the table on fire! Experience? Yes.
As for Steve-o Mnuchin, recently discovered that he was the executive producer for the animated film “Storks”. And he got picked for Treasury Secretary. As for his refugee thin wife, the last time I saw that much leather in one place it was on a sling shot.
9Just read the link! Was appalled at the clam shell thing, especially when I think of all those who will not be having a Thanksgiving dinner thanks to Trump’s policies. Our worst Thanksgivings were during the Reagan administration when so many people were cut from the federal government, the biggest employer in my area. We were lucky to have Spam to be thankful for! God! That man was no saint! The same for his party! Ronnie was on one side of his mouth praising himself for all the equal opportunity women in his administration and government. Then he pulled the plug and it was the women who got hit hardest. When my husband was reduced in grade (Ronnie figured he made too much money as a civil servant) he was told he could knock out a female civil servant and take her job! Tells you everything you ever wanted to know. And no, my husband told the smart mouth he didn’t beat up on women and just gritted his way through the pay reduction.
10I’ve ate at Luby’s. Please, please tell me that the string beans and the jello are 2 different dishes.
11JJ — hear, hear! I sure hope your green beans are the Thanksgiving casserole kind with the mushroom soup and the fried onion rings on top. Yum, yum!
12Those table decorations look like something that washed ashore in Puerto Rico after hurricane Irma. Probably souvenirs from Donald’s visit where he tossed paper towels to the peasants.
13Read the Huffpost article and laughed till I nearly cried. Ivanka couldn’t decorate a table, or anything else, with instructions my eight year old granddaughter could follow. At first glacé I thought the centerpiece was for a bleached blonde Halloween. Oh well. I have a giant clam shell. Mine is over 1 million years old and a real treasure. I wouldn’t embarrass my clam shell by filling it with white mini pumpkins, branches and other junk.
14Wait – that’s been “arranged”?
I thought that Ivanka’s blood sugar dropped too low – gotta stay thin, y’know – and her arms just collapsed, dumping everything into the clamshell. Why else would that pumpkin on the left be jauntily perched in the giant crystal goblet?
Don’t try leaning over the table, guests – you’ll poke your eye out!
Good grief; if this is their concept of Classy Decor, I don’t even want to think about the food.
15Guess this goes with the trumpy bear commercial I saw on tv last night. I heard Keurig has dropped commercials on at least one Fox show; I’d be plenty pleased if stations refused trumpy bear ads, too.
16It may just be me, but Thanksgiving dinner means at least one more person than the table can comfortably hold, and the entire center filled with platters and bowls of food. We couldn’t possibly fit the giant clam and albino pumpkins without relegating my brother and sister in law to the kitchen.
17There was a good alternative to that messy turkey at one of the annual Spam recipie contests. Just take some Spam, and some Velveta cheese. Slice each one up in to thin slices. Then make a new loaf out of alternating slices of Spam and Velveta and tie it all together with some twine. Now pour over it what ever sweet stuff you like best, like maybe apple jelly, honey or maple syrup. There you go, you’re all ready with a lot less fuss and a lot more taste. You could even make individual personal mini loafs for each guest of any size you like.
18JD Carroll –
Uuuhhhhhhh, no.
Just NO.
On second thought: DEAR GOD – NOOOOOO!!!
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