Archive for December, 2014

Update on Scalise: Knowing Your Klansmen

December 30, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay, so here’s the deal on Republican Majority Whip Steve Scalise.  He now says that he did speak to that group but

House Majority Whip Steve Scalise, R-La., said Monday that he did attend a conference of white nationalists as a state legislator in 2002 but that he didn’t know the nature of the group and that “if I knew today what they were about, I wouldn’t go.”

Well hell, I guess so.  You also probably wouldn’t have robbed that bank and cracked boobie jokes in church if you had known that you were gonna get caught, you damn fool.

You know, you’d think maybe the white hoods with eye holes would have been a clue.  Or maybe the fact that they paid you with confederate dollars. Or all the shaved heads and swastika tattoos – and that was on the women! Did you think that people doing the Hitler salute were raising their hands to ask questions?

Holy twinkies in heaven above, Skippy, are you saying that if you walked into an Isis terrorist meeting you wouldn’t notice?  If that’s the deal, we sure as heck don’t need you in congress.

Even blind man would know he was in a room of rednecks from the smell of Aqua Velva and Axe body spray.

And here’s the clincher.  David Damn Duke was the keynote speaker.  Where the fool tarnation did you think you were – a GQ Spiffy Dresser of Year awards ceremony?

Dude, resign.  Now.  This morning you went from being a racist to be a racist and a damn fool.  You’re not going to make it to lunch without adding liar to that.  And by dinner?  I see disgraced coming.


Yeah, But Can You Name Me One Louisiana Congressman Who Hasn’t?

December 29, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Steve Scalise is the new House Majority Whip, making him the third most powerful man in the House.  He’s from Louisiana and he’s a doozy.

Twelve years before he was elected by his colleagues as House Majority Whip, Rep. Steve Scalise (R-La.) spoke at a conference hosted by white supremacist group European-American Unity and Rights Organization.

It was a group founded by David Duke and Duke spoke at the conference, too.

100514_scalise_276Scalise now says that he would speak to “any group” back then to gain support for this elimination of a “slush fund.”   The slush fund he was so upset about was HUD funds, which he called, “an apparent give-away to a selective group based on race.”

Yeah.  Housing and Urban Development funds.

Scalise’s office issued a statement —

“He has never been affiliated with the abhorrent group in question. The hate-fueled ignorance and intolerance that group projects is in stark contradiction to what Mr. Scalise believes and practices as a father, a husband, and a devoted Catholic.”

However, he did not leave the conference after hearing other racist speakers nor did the materials shown offend him back then.

And then there’s this little thingy.

Two years after speaking at the conference, Scalise was one of just six state representatives who voted to oppose making Martin Luther King Day a state holiday.

I dunno, but if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck …

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

It’s The Challenge of the Year

December 29, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay, the kids over at Political Wire have given us a heads up on who is running for President of the United States by their upcoming books.

January 13: American Dreams: Restoring Economic Opportunity for Everyone by Sen. Marco Rubio

January 20: God, Guns, Grits, and Gravy by Mike Huckabee

February 3: You Have a Brain: A Teen’s Guide to T.H.I.N.K. B.I.G. by Ben Carson M.D.

May 5: Times of Challenge, Moments of Grace by Carly Fiorina

May 12: Untitled by Sen. Ted Cruz

Oh y’all.  Ted Cruz’s book doesn’t have a title.  I feel is our ordained duty to give that sucker a name.

Ready, Set, Go!

Thanks to Kyle for the heads up.


Limbaugh. Rush Limbaugh.

December 29, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Limbaugh is shaken, not stirred.

For you hooter toters without eyes, I guess I need to tell you that Idris Elba is one fine lookin’ hunk of flesh.  We’re talking gorgeous.  And, honey, he wears his pants so tight that I can’t breathe.

Screen Shot 2014-12-29 at 10.06.25 AMIt has been suggested that Elba should be the next James Bond.  You know, in the movies.  Where it’s fiction.  You know, made up.

But, holy cow, Rush Limbaugh is not going easily into that goodnight of the white male, bygawd.  Rush says that cannot happen.

Limbaugh argued during his show on Tuesday that Elba shouldn’t be cast as Bond because he’s a “black Briton” and the MI-6 protagonist was conceived as a white man from Scotland.

Shuddup, you wasted old fart white guy.  Just shuddup.

James Bond takes off his shirt at least once in every movie.  I will pay money to see that.

Limbaugh admits …

I know it’s racist to probably point this out.

Racist, yes, of course.  But it’s also bad grammar and really, really insane.

Really insane.

This Will Make You Feel Dizzy

December 28, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

There is a group of steeple people in Kentucky who are furious that the government is discriminating against them by punishing them for discriminating.

Yeah, my head hurts.  But, the story is cool.

Ark-encounter1-680x425These guys are building Noah’s Ark in Kentucky.  They feel that it will be a great tourist attraction.  Who knows?  People go to Dollyworld.  Need I say more?

So, they set themselves up as a non-profit and applied for $18 million in tax incentives from the good people of Kentucky.

One problem.  They will only hire you to work there if you are a fundamentalist Christian.

Stewart explains that their application will not go forward because the state will not grant incentives to a company that openly intends to discriminate in hiring based on religion, saying it is a violation of the state constitution for these incentives to be used to advance religion.

Let the whining begin!

The mastermind of this park, Ken Ham, says he’s being persecuted.

Ken Ham penned a fundraising letter last week claiming the governor is launching a “massive attack” on their religious freedom and persecuting his organization “because of our Christian message.”

Okay, grab ahold of something because the spin is fixing to get wild.

Ham decided to take to the power of a fundraising letter!  Of damn course.  His letter says —

But as is clear settled law, churches and other religious organizations are allowed to hire employees who agree with their religious viewpoint!

Who would have ever thought that such governmental interference would come to America!

Wait!  Wait!  You can hired whoever you want, but you – who is asking for $18 million from the damn government! – is whining about government interference?

Wait!  Wait!  I thought y’all were the people who believe in free markets.

Dude, climb down off your cross of greed.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.

Blonde Privilege

December 28, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Honey, it pays in more ways than one to be a big haired blonde.

Screen Shot 2014-12-28 at 12.07.11 PMJulia Shields is 45 years old and lives in a really nice neighborhood in Chattanooga.  Neighbors and police says she took off in her car at 4:00 in the afternoon last Friday and created more havoc than you can imagine.

The cops first came upon a couple who say an unknown woman shot at random into their car, luckily hitting only the radiator.  Then reports started coming in that she was firing at other vehicles and even shot at people in their yards.

Police finally located her in the parking lot of Stuart Heights Baptist Church.  When she saw the police, she took off.

She led officers on a high speed chase as she continued shooting at vehicles.

Eventually, officers stopped and arrested Shields at Cloverdale Drive and Koblan Drive, near the spot where the shootings occurred and just blocks from her house. She pointed her firearm at an officer, but was taken into custody without incident or injury, the release stated.

Without incident or injury.

I’m telling ya – big blonde hair is magical.

Thanks to Ralph for the heads up.