Archive for February, 2011

Home From the Texas Rally

February 27, 2011 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized


Okay, Dudes and Dudettes, I’m home from the rally in Austin.  I took my camera and will share pictures of my favorite signs.  There were about 1,000 people there, including the damn near perfect Jim Hightower, who announced that Rick Perry puts the goober in gubernatorial.  Hal’s got the speech.  You’ll love it!  Hal’s also got some pictures.

I took pictures of signs. Enjoy!  You can click on any of the signs to see them larger.

We didn't cause the fire

Not a bad idea

Keeping it simple

It wouldn't be an Austin rally without Rick Perry

He's right, you know

The Koch Beast?

Please start noticing that all the words on these signs are spelled correctly

My friend and frequent beauty salon visitor, Lyn

This was a popular theme

Popular and correct

Bubba's personal favorite

The Texas Observer Button

Oh yeah, I forgot about that

Yes, we are and we are not amused

If you haven't seen The Big Lebowski ...

This here is your all-purpose, reuseable, got it covered, ready made general progressive rally sign.

My personal favorite, referring to Texas' rainy day fund that Rick Perry refuses to use

Bubba and me enjoying it all

I want my friends in Wisconsin to know that Texas cares.

And our Washington DeeCee foreign correspondent, Barbara, sent us this cutie pie from the DeeCee rally —

I also need to tell you that there was a Planned Parenthood rally at noon in Texas.  Here’s my favorite signs from that one:

You go girl!

and, of course ….

I love this young woman.

Friday Toon

February 25, 2011 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

667: Evil and Then Some

February 25, 2011 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized


Okay, so most of you have already heard that Georgia Republican Paul Broun was seriously asked, “Who is going to kill Obama?” at a townhall meeting.

“Okay, it’s Georgia, where sitting around and drinking beer while watching the mosquito zapper on a Saturday night is counted as a cultural event,” Juanita says.  “It does not shock me that someone in a dirty stars and bars tee-shirt with the sleeves cut out was drunk enough to ask that question.”

“However, Rep. Broun’s answer does indeed shock me.”

“The thing is, I know there’s a lot of frustration with this president. We’re going to have an election next year. Hopefully, we’ll elect somebody that’s going to be a conservative, limited-government president that will take a smaller, who will sign a bill to repeal and replace Obamacare.”

“Okay, so where’s the part where he says, ‘Are you freekin’ nuts?  This is America, where killing people is not a wise political decision.  Shuddup and take a shower, you damn fool.’  I wanna know where that part is,” Juanita demands.

“Where’s the part where Broun says, ‘Officer, this man is threatening the President of the Danged United States of America and Commander in Chief.  Come throw his hefty rump in the dumpster.’  Did they just not transcribe that part?”

“I’d even settle for the part where Broun says, ‘Is there a mental health professional in the house?  We have a mental health emergency.'”

So, instead, I will say this,” Juanita prepares herself to speak to Representative Paul Broun, “If you sit on a cactus patch, Mr. Broun, you can count on having to pull stickers out of your butt.  You, my friend, better start pickin’ before I help with hissy fit the size of Atlanta.  Tell everybody what you should have said, and then apologize to the President of the United States, you sorry festering worthless son of a redneck lunatic.”

I think she means it about the hissy fit part.

Meet Me In Austin Tomorrow

February 25, 2011 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized


Juanita and the entire staff of the World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc. will be at the steps of the State Capitol tomorrow afternoon at 2:00 to join with other Texans in support of our brothers and sisters in Wisconsin against the corporate takeover of America.  Our hero, Jim Hightower, is gonna speak.

Be a real American and be there.

Click here to find the rally nearest you and send me pictures, dammit.

Is There A Teacher In The House?

February 25, 2011 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized


Just when you think it can’t get worse, of course it does.

PROVIDENCE — After two hours of contentious discussion, the School Board voted 4 to 3 Thursday night to send out termination notices to each of the city’s 1,926 public school teachers.

Every teacher received a certified letter from the School Department on Thursday informing them that they might be terminated at the end of the school year. It also said the School Board would vote on the proposed dismissals at Thursday night’s meeting, which was moved to the Providence Career and Technical Academy to accommodate the huge turnout.

Customer Ralph thinks, “It sorta reminds me of the restaurant customer who ticked off the waitress BEFORE she brought out the food. I’m not saying that these teachers will spit on the children the way a waitress might spit on the food, but it certainly seems like bad timing to me.”

“Worse yet,” Juanita thinks, “what if they all move to Texas and become hairdressers?”

Why did the school board choose firing instead of issuing layoffs?

“This is a back-door Wisconsin,” Smith said, referring to the weeklong protests in Madison by labor unions. “We don’t know why we’re being fired. The mayor says he needs flexibility. Can you buy that? I don’t know of any other district that has done this.”

Okay, all you teachers who voted Republican in the last election, head on up to the blackboard and write, “I will not be a stinkin’ idiot and ever vote Republican again in my whole life”  100 times.

The Laundry Loophole

February 24, 2011 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized


They’re calling it the Laundry Loophole.

Hairspray and Cobwebs

Remember Texas Republican State Rep Debbie Riddle?  The one who gets screwdrivers for Christmas because she has so many loose screws?

Remember that she camped out for three days at the door of the state lege so she could be the first to file the meanest anti-immigrant bill on God’s green earth?

Remember how she went on teevee and announced that terror babies were coming and they were gonna kill you and then eat you?

Well, howdy do.  Little Miss Debbie has filed a new bill.

You’re gonna think I’m making this up, but I’m not.  I swear I’m not.  You could not make up HB 1202.

Under Riddle’s bill, it would be a state jail felony to hire an undocumented worker.  Unless – and here’s the part you’re not going to believe – with the exception of one worker for “domestic services” per household.

Yep, you can own one slave.  And she has to do the laundry and windows.

Thank you, Debbie Riddle, for reminding me today why Republicans suck.