I guess I better tell you upfront that Juanita has a crush on Paul Krugman.  She will hush everybody in the beauty shop to listen to him when he comes on tv and has read all his books like they were Teen Beat Magazine. She even has a “What Would Paul Do?” checkbook cover.

“He’s hotter than a two dollar pistol,” she says.  “Honey, if I ever got the chance to flirt with him, it would set off smoke alarms in a five state area.  It’d melt diamonds.”

One of Juanita’s beauticians, Winston Taylor “Twirlie” Harrison, also has a crush on Paul Krugman.  Winston delights in teasing Juanita by swooning and dissolving into a puddle of glands every time Paul Krugman comes on tv.  Juanita, who according to Wikipedia invented teasing, prefaces all remarks about Krugman by beginning, “Paul Krugman, who is notoriously not gay ….”

It’s a Paul Krugman day at the beauty shop.

Juanita begins, “Okay, so we have ourselves a 10% unemployment rate in this country and that may become 11% if Thelma is late again today, and the big solution that’s gonna be announced is that we’re freezing spending on everything … except the things we spend money on.  Goodness sake, on the one hand, you feed the 20% of folks with mental health disorders and their anti-government frenzy and then on the other hand, you don’t help the economy any at all.  What goat came up with that idea?”

I guess I need to stop here and tell you that Juanita is wearing leopard print capri’s this morning with a turquoise silk top.  Even while doing hair, she waves her hairbrush around when she gets excited, her bracelets providing background music for her comments.  She once accidently knocked Miss Verdelia upside the head during a particularly impassioned explanation of Iraqi policy.  Miss Verdelia is 88 years old and doesn’t have all that many head whacks left in her, so Juanita stands silent when she does Miss Verdelia’s hair.  That’s love, because silence is hard, hard, hard for Juanita.

Where there is ying, there is yang or at least something akin to it.  So, where there is Paul Krugman, there is Rahm Emanuel.

Juanita developed a true dislike of Emanuel back when he was Chairman of the DCCC.  Her opinion is probably not fixable because she personally saw Emanuel waste money like a drunk cowboy on payday.  “Hey, at least the cowboy is wasting his own money.  Emanuel was wasting Democrat money,” she stomps.  But, that’s a whole ‘nother story we’ll save for later.

Juanita is not pleased with the coterie of economic fixers in the Obama administration.  “You’d think it’s their first rodeo,” she grimaces.  “They couldn’t drive a nail into a snowbank with a sledgehammer.”

“Now, I know there are people who will argue with me,” she says as she looks over the top of her half rim rhinestone glasses at Thelma, who arrived late.  Thelma always attempts to argue with Juanita by quoting Glenn Beck.  Glenn Beck is her Paul Krugman.  Thelma is a Republican and a provisional member of the Belles of Heaven Republican Women’s Club.  Bless her heart.

“Obama is a communist,” Thelma starts and stops in four words because she can see Juanita has a pink slip in her back pocket and an attitude in the front one. Juanita fires Thelma at least once a month but Thelma just keeps coming back to work.  That, and the fact that she does the best up-do in town keeps Thelma employed for the most part.

Oh yes, Paul Krugman day.  Let me get back to that.

Juanita is a tad disappointed that she has to wait until his next column to see what Paul Krugman has to say about the planned freezing of government spending on everything but what we spend money on.  But she thinks she knows what he’ll say.

“He’ll say,” she is betting, “what goat came up with that idea?”

Except probably in Harvard economist terms.

Welcome to the new place.  Over to the right will explain what’s going on and you can meander around the other pages to catch up to where everybody else is playing.

We’re still working out the kinks.  So let me know if something’s not working right.  Not that I’ll do anything about it, but you’ll feel so much better for having proved yourself smarter than I am.

Right now, because of people like Charlie and Chris, your comments have to be approved.  I am trying to figure out how to let people I know post without approval while keeping the old kinky Republican men from spending all day typing Rush’s radio program on my website because they can’t get dates, friends, laid, a meaning to life, or a golf foursome.

I have often been amused by bloggers who rail against the corporate media and then get themselves paid to support candidates as “consultants.”  While I reserve the right to donate to candidates, I do not take money from any of them.  I do, however, get paid to do hair.  I just wanted to be clear on that.

Being funny on purpose is a little harder, ya know.

Texas Republican Governor and UnMensa member, Rick Perry wants you to know something.

Looking over campaign finance reports can tell you more than who is giving and what the candidate is spending. Sometimes a mis-type can give insight into a campaign’s real thoughts. Or maybe not.

For Gov. Rick Perry, two little misprints within a page of each other seemed pretty telling. On a section outlining his political travels, he listed a trip to New York, where he was joined by Texas business leaders for the, as explanation read, “NASDAQ Closing Bell Ceremoney.”

And on a separate entry, the governor attended an NRA breakfast in our nation’s capital, which he has vilified as the seat of waste and sloth throughout the campaign. As his finance report states, the breakfast was held in “Washington VD.”

Yes, I am a happier woman today because the Texas Republicans are splattering like egg on a hot sidewalk.

Thanks to my friend Kenneth, I awoke to news that they’ve got loco camped out in their eyeballs.

A whole mess of them held a rally at the State Capitol where they skinned, field dressed, barbequed, and ate their own. It was fine dining.

With rhetoric that was at times reminiscent of Ross Perot’s third-party presidential campaign nearly two decades ago, and sometimes echoed the invective hurled during the states’ rights movement before the Civil War, speaker after speaker served up their harshest criticism of Obama and Congress.

But Perry and his GOP re-election challenger, U.S. Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison, and state lawmakers did not escape the anger. Other signs read: “Vote ‘Em Out,” “Perry: The Next Unemployed Texan,” Hey, Governor. It’s Time To Go!” and “Throw Out Kay Bail Out.”

It is more than a tad amusing that Texas Governor Rick Perry helped start the movement that’s now out of his control and dead set on canceling his free parking pass.

They booed a few Republican State Rep’s and made some wacko remarks about the President. I suspect that their earlier code of respecting the President onlyapplies to Presidents named Bush.

“The time has come for people to rise up and defeat their anti-American, Marxist agenda,” he said of the Obama administration and the Democratic Congress, as the crowd cheered.

They did come to one startling realization that most the rest of us have known for a while —

“The Republican Party tried to use us, but we’re onto them now,” said Norman Shugar, 77, who drove in from outside Houston.

Hey, Rick and Sarah Palin – check behind you because those you thought you were leading are now carrying tar and feathers. You aren’t leading anymore – you’re being chased.applies to Presidents named Bush.

“The time has come for people to rise up and defeat their anti-American, Marxist agenda,” he said of the Obama administration and the Democratic Congress, as the crowd cheered.

They did come to one startling realization that most the rest of us have known for a while —

“The Republican Party tried to use us, but we’re onto them now,” said Norman Shugar, 77, who drove in from outside Houston.

Hey, Rick and Sarah Palin – check behind you because those you thought you were leading are now carrying tar and feathers. You aren’t leading anymore – you’re being chased.

In the “I Don’t Trust Air I Can See” Department, we have this report —

Children in Texas are more likely to miss school when certain types of air pollution increase — even when the levels are below the limit set by the federal government, a new study says.

The research also shows that absences decrease significantly when pollution decreases.

The study is unusual because it tracks the impact on a large group: 39 of the biggest school districts in Texas, including Dallas and Fort Worth. In El Paso, which has some of the state’s worst air pollution, the reduction in carbon monoxide levels resulted in a 0.8 percent decrease in the rate of absences.

Now, I can’t wait for the pollution deniers to bounce out with a new ad that says kids don’t need air anyway. It’s haze they need.
The idiot train is always full.